Friday, May 30, 2008

tofu mu

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it seems like all of my jeans make a clicking noise in the crotch when i walk.
what is up with THAT? it must have to do with lycra/spandex and then my pants being too big a little? i don't know but it is weird.

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okay, um.

Thursday, May 29, 2008


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okay, here goes! more tidbits about the nursing home.
this is my anthropological ethnography of attitudes toward the elderly in Amerikuh.

There is a woman who always smiles... she has an endearing happy sweet smile, but it is an inward smile and not really directed at anyone so it makes you wonder, what is she smiling about? is it just a reflex? is there some pleasure center being stimulated in her brain? is it a malfunction? also she speaks in a sort of free-associative poetic form and sometimes she sings. but if someone else is singing or making noise she says, "oh shut the hell up!"

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i take pictures of the food they eat (and sometimes eat it myself) just cuz and also partly because it is part of my ethnography. i have to record what sort of food we feed these people at the HOTEL RITZ as we like to call it.
well, it outta be called that for the amount of money it costs to live there. eh.

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and let me just tell you the lasagna was DELISHus cuz it was tangy and meaty and i love cauliflower and the bread was good cuz it was really sour altho i would not call it Garlic Bread, which is what was written on the menu.

i was so full after i ate all of that i really felt sluggish for the rest of the workday.

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there is a man there who calls me 'boots' cuz i mostly wear my blue doc marten boots to work. then, after he calls me boots he looks at my boots, every time. he has to make sure i am still wearing them. one time he looked and i was wearing some other shoes and he was disappointed... so now, i try to always wear my boots.

and the man who wants to marry me (but he is such a Player, cuz he is after all the ladies) intro'd me to his grown daughter (who's older than me) and i told her he and i are to be married and she said, "well, HI MOM!" hahaha.

call me a leper

brekkiethe color's all wrong
today is my Friday!
to celebrate, i had this for breakfast.
it doesn't look very appetizing, cuz my picture situation is so unreliable and sucky... but uh... and it was a pretty 'wet' omelet, but anywayzzzz.
i'm glad i ate it, i guess.
usually i go around starving to death. and daydreaming about food.

Picture 007trying to capture what i see but it's not working
i actually am a social pariah. well, i classify as one. especially if we lived in India under the caste system. cuz of the work i do. i would be considered an 'untouchable'... but many of you consider me that way anyway... so.
but i love how my bangs are today, but i didn't capture it very well when i tried to take pics.

out and about
talk to you later!
don't freak out til then@!

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

too bad for you, i guess.

hawaiian car ornament
i logged into facebook and i have so much to look at like messages and invites and all that crap and i just felt overwhelmed. i poked a few people. one of them was/is my high school boyfriend and his pic shows him with a little tiny newborn baby. aw.
sad a little. but still happy for him.

today is kind of a hard day for me.
something gonna happen that gives me anxiety.
i had anxiety dreams all night long.

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i also felt bad for being amused by the old woman's plight at the nursing home.
it isn't funny, really... but what can i do? save her? cry? it is what it is.

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i went into the theater just to use the bathroom (i did not watch a movie, bad girl, i know so tacky and stuff) but this woman came out of the stall and she said, "good movie huh?" and i was like, "yep" and she's all, "lots of ACTION"
gee, i wonder which movie she meant.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

BLOG blog blog blog

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the same old lady i've mentioned before, she tends to really crack me up.
she said today, "where is room 13?" and a CNA told her "we don't have a room 13" and the old lady says, "then, why'd you tell me there was one?" (which: nobody'd told her it was just out of the blue)
i chuckled over that exchange for about a half hour (off and on)
it still tickles me.

also, that same woman took off her lap belt which is supposed to keep her from standing up unsupervised and when she takes it off an alarm will sound.... so a CNA came to put the lapbelt back on and she got MAD and started kicking at him and saying "I don't sleep with a BELT on!"

she's a spitfire that one.

i happen to BE a valley girl. sorry.

i'm a little annoyed because i don't have my USB cord with me so i can't upload any pictures and i haven't even been able to blog at all for like it feels like EVER.

and actually, i am not sorry that i am a valley girl. it's a true fact.
and how many times do i have to express this: MY BLOG is not done SERIOUSLY.
it is not to be TAKEN SERIOUSLY, either.


not to be rude.

Friday, May 23, 2008


free book woodrow wilson
i am friends with a deaf person, so now i have had reason to use Relay Service where you can talk with a deaf person on the phone? and like uh.... i always laugh, but i stifle my laughter and stuff so as not to be rude to the relay operator. but for some reason i just find it very amuzing to be having a third party involved in my phone convos. it makes me talk weird. it makes me think differently than i normally do and i frequently forget what i am even saying or going to say. it is just totally awkward. you have to decide what you're saying and where to stop and start and it's all really slow and there are these huge long pauses... it just throws a whole 'nother wrench into the human interaction puzzle machine.

the library is closing in like ten minutes and then i need to go to the bank and figure out how to best make use of what time i have available to me. DANG it!
i'm one of those who wastes a lot of time thinking about how to spend my time. like hours, we're talking here. HELP.

oh there is this one woman at 'the nursing home' and she always wants to escape. actually a lot of them do. anyway, she tried again today and when they tried to bring her back, telling her it looks like rain, she said "HELP! HELP! Call the cops! I only came here to see what this school was like and now they won't let me leave. And it's not a school!"

now, that is a little bit funny and a lot sad... but certainly interesting, to me.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

something is not lost in translation

tinker toy drawring on masonite with sharpies
yesterday, i tried to watch Margot at the Wedding... but something was wrong with the DVD, i think... cuz it kept going red to black and then back to normal throughout the whole movie. but, that movie was like um... uncomfortable.
especially when she is in the book interview thingy.
i think that movie was about me, too.
just like the other one. Fur.
i'm one of those types of people, i think.
like... i don't know...
but you know, you see, that interesting movies and books are often about kinda messed up people? besides, who ISN'T kinda messed up? duh.

try not to barf

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Wednesday, May 21, 2008

don't TINKER with my TOYS

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here is my work hair today.

ugh. i have trouble picking out anti-perspirants with fragrances i like. i chose Secret Jasmine something or other and i HATE it. damn.

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today, i wanted to buy lunch at work and i asked what they were having and the lady answered, "liver and onions!" and i thought she was joking, but she was serious and i decided to go ahead and have it anyway cuz i've hated it ever since i was a kid, but i figured who knows, some people like it so i guess i should try it, then. well. it was okay only because i mixed it in with the mashed taters, gravy and veggies. otherwise.. meh. but i liked the onions tho. i just hate raw onions, but cooked ones are okay.

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my next painting is going to be of this lawn mower.